As a nurse who has years of experience in home care I have seen both ends of life’s spectrum. The decision to stop treatment at the end of life. And the decision to continue at the beginning of life. Your son is loved first and foremost by God Almighty. You have surrendered him to Him. All decisions after that are made in peace. Not in ease. Not in ease for you, your husband or other children. in peace. In joy. In love. Our lives are not to be what makes us happy or is easiest, but what glorifies God. Hummmm how does this bring glory to God. I can’t answer that. You can, in a million ways, God shows His majesty in your life. There you find His glory. Something the “hurtful poster” will never comprehend till Christ softens their heart. Thank you for sharing.
Very well stated! The Lord is giving you wisdom for each situation and Calvin is a beautiful living example of what love does for the severely medically handicapped.
My mother in law took care of one of her daughters until she passed away at age 52 increasingly complicated medical problems. She had a feeding tube also for the last few years of her life and the daughter could no longer speak. It is hard for Christians to know what interventions are within the will of God. Thank you for such a thoughtful article.
This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve read in a long time…you articulate something so difficult so well, and you do so with the awareness of sacrificial love. Thank you for loving and caring for this precious son God has given you…He holds his days and times and every breath, and you & your husband have been faithful to honor his life as you honor the One who gave him to you. In a world where even life itself is about convenience, you encourage me & remind me that there are people who grasp with great wisdom, that life is a gift even though it is often bittersweet…
May His grace always uphold you as you care for and provide for your son; his value doesn’t depend on what he can do, just as ours doesn’t. One day he will be made whole; one day you will truly know that whatever love costs us, it is always worth it.
Hello, thank you so much for such a great article. I am a mum of tow children with life-limiting conditions but I am also a paediatric nurse who works in a special school for kids with complex medical needs in the UK. We have 5 children with trachys and on venilators nad many other children who nee these life-saving interventions to keep them going. Not many of them have Christian parents so it is refreshing for me to hear your perspective and your wrestling with this. I am praying that God continues to give you strength, wisdom and peace in your parenting journey!
I am so glad I found you through Tabletalk! You are not only a thoughtful Christ follower but a gifted writer and loving and committed wife and mother. We have a 28-year old special needs son and four adult children who have grown up with him. I look forward to reading your articles, here and in Tabletalk, and will pray for you and your family.
Beautifully and thoughtfully said. As a mother of a special needs child (actually adult, she's 23) who just got a trache and is going home on a ventilator after pneumonia almost killed her, this was written just for me. I know people will secretly wonder why we 'just don't let her go". But my daughter fought to live. And we will support her efforts. God knows when He is going to take her home. In fact, she died for 12 minutes and then came back. Her eyes told us that she was still 'in there' so we did not just 'let her go peacefully'. We got her a feeding tube at age one and we continue to take the best care of her that we can. She is our child, why wouldn't we?
Really beautiful article in response to the unthoughtful comment. I really appreciate these little windows into your life with Calvin. Our medically complex son went to live with Jesus at the age of 6 months and I wonder if our lives would be similar if he was still living here on earth. We also have sorrow and joy together. Sorrow because our boy is not here with us and joy that he is free from earthly struggles and is with our Savior!
Dear Kara! Wow! Thanks so much for sharing such personal experiences and insights! God has given you both extraordinary ability, patience and love in caring for Calvin. I’d say a demonstration of Gods abounding and continuous love…. never ending. The person who posted… showed quite the opposite. “Darkened understanding”. Keep courage as God is on your side. May He continue to be glorified and honored in all of this! ❤️🙏
Oh, Kara…straight from your heart…Calvin’s story (and all of your stories that are connected) is so special! Only God knows all the lives he has impacted along the way…so thankful that you have allowed me to join you along the way…I have learned from all of you and love you all❣️Thank you for writing this article💗🙏!
As a nurse who has years of experience in home care I have seen both ends of life’s spectrum. The decision to stop treatment at the end of life. And the decision to continue at the beginning of life. Your son is loved first and foremost by God Almighty. You have surrendered him to Him. All decisions after that are made in peace. Not in ease. Not in ease for you, your husband or other children. in peace. In joy. In love. Our lives are not to be what makes us happy or is easiest, but what glorifies God. Hummmm how does this bring glory to God. I can’t answer that. You can, in a million ways, God shows His majesty in your life. There you find His glory. Something the “hurtful poster” will never comprehend till Christ softens their heart. Thank you for sharing.
Very well stated! The Lord is giving you wisdom for each situation and Calvin is a beautiful living example of what love does for the severely medically handicapped.
My mother in law took care of one of her daughters until she passed away at age 52 increasingly complicated medical problems. She had a feeding tube also for the last few years of her life and the daughter could no longer speak. It is hard for Christians to know what interventions are within the will of God. Thank you for such a thoughtful article.
This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve read in a long time…you articulate something so difficult so well, and you do so with the awareness of sacrificial love. Thank you for loving and caring for this precious son God has given you…He holds his days and times and every breath, and you & your husband have been faithful to honor his life as you honor the One who gave him to you. In a world where even life itself is about convenience, you encourage me & remind me that there are people who grasp with great wisdom, that life is a gift even though it is often bittersweet…
May His grace always uphold you as you care for and provide for your son; his value doesn’t depend on what he can do, just as ours doesn’t. One day he will be made whole; one day you will truly know that whatever love costs us, it is always worth it.
God bless you🙏💗
Hello, thank you so much for such a great article. I am a mum of tow children with life-limiting conditions but I am also a paediatric nurse who works in a special school for kids with complex medical needs in the UK. We have 5 children with trachys and on venilators nad many other children who nee these life-saving interventions to keep them going. Not many of them have Christian parents so it is refreshing for me to hear your perspective and your wrestling with this. I am praying that God continues to give you strength, wisdom and peace in your parenting journey!
I am so glad I found you through Tabletalk! You are not only a thoughtful Christ follower but a gifted writer and loving and committed wife and mother. We have a 28-year old special needs son and four adult children who have grown up with him. I look forward to reading your articles, here and in Tabletalk, and will pray for you and your family.
Beautifully and thoughtfully said. As a mother of a special needs child (actually adult, she's 23) who just got a trache and is going home on a ventilator after pneumonia almost killed her, this was written just for me. I know people will secretly wonder why we 'just don't let her go". But my daughter fought to live. And we will support her efforts. God knows when He is going to take her home. In fact, she died for 12 minutes and then came back. Her eyes told us that she was still 'in there' so we did not just 'let her go peacefully'. We got her a feeding tube at age one and we continue to take the best care of her that we can. She is our child, why wouldn't we?
Really beautiful article in response to the unthoughtful comment. I really appreciate these little windows into your life with Calvin. Our medically complex son went to live with Jesus at the age of 6 months and I wonder if our lives would be similar if he was still living here on earth. We also have sorrow and joy together. Sorrow because our boy is not here with us and joy that he is free from earthly struggles and is with our Savior!
Thank you for sharing!
Dear Kara! Wow! Thanks so much for sharing such personal experiences and insights! God has given you both extraordinary ability, patience and love in caring for Calvin. I’d say a demonstration of Gods abounding and continuous love…. never ending. The person who posted… showed quite the opposite. “Darkened understanding”. Keep courage as God is on your side. May He continue to be glorified and honored in all of this! ❤️🙏
Thank you for this, Kara. We love you all so much and will continue to pray for dear Calvin and that the Lord would uphold your whole family.
Oh, Kara…straight from your heart…Calvin’s story (and all of your stories that are connected) is so special! Only God knows all the lives he has impacted along the way…so thankful that you have allowed me to join you along the way…I have learned from all of you and love you all❣️Thank you for writing this article💗🙏!